Silken Tide Page 7

“Wait a minute! Wait a minute! You forgot to ask the lady! What do you think, Jess? You ready to dance with a real man?” Jeremy’s sardonic laughter filled the pavilion.

  Mark clenched his jaw and adrenaline began to pulsate through his veins. Mark turned to him, so that his face was just inches from Jeremy’s.

  “You know what, Jeremy? You may have it over me on the boat. I’ll give you that. But women? Women are my department. Have been for years. You could say I’m an expert. So, maybe you should step back and take a few notes on how a real man handles this kind of business.” Mark jabbed Jeremy’s chest with his two fingers and Jeremy stumbled back a few steps.

  “Now, where were we?” Mark faced Jessica again.

  Not a moment later, he felt another poke to his shoulder. Mark didn’t need to turn around to know who it was. He gritted his teeth and he shook his head in disgust before facing Jeremy.

  “Didn’t I tell you…”

  But before he could finish his words, Mark’s world shook and he fell back to the hardwood floor. At first, he didn’t know what just happened. But a brief moment later, confusion was replaced with pain to the right side of his face and something dripped from his brow. Mark wiped his eye and then examined his hand. Blood. He looked up to find Jeremy standing over him, face red, with his fist balled at his side. Mark scrambled to his feet and fury spread over his body like wildfire. He lunged at Jeremy and grabbed him by his shirt. Just as he lifted his fist to land a punch of his own, a few fishermen that Mark recognized from the docks got between them, tearing them apart.

  “Go home and sleep it off, Jeremy.” The fishermen loosened their grip on Jeremy and pushed him in the opposite direction of Mark.

  Mark’s chest heaved as he watched Jeremy stumble out of the pavilion and into the night. He didn’t know what stung worse; the laceration above his brow or the fact that the fight was over a woman. He felt stupid; all it took was one moment of letting his guard down. Where there were women, there were men wrestling on the floor like fools. At that moment, Mark shifted his attention to Jessica. Her eyes were wide with shock as she looked up at his bleeding brow. She reached up and softly brushed the side of his face. Mark jerked his head away, making her flinch and retract her hand as if she had been burned. He pushed past Jessica, his footsteps echoing on the hardwood floors as he left the pavilion.

  Women. They can’t be trusted.

  *

  That evening, Mark stepped over the threshold of his father’s door into the cool night air. Even though the screen door shut hard behind him, it wasn’t enough to wake him from his hypnotic state. He wasn’t focused on anything besides the thousands of urgent voices calling to him. They were coming from out there. They were coming from the sea. The grass felt cool under his bare feet as he stepped out into the yard. Mark followed a lit path created by the moon to the edge of the property that extended past the yard and unfolded like a silk ribbon onto the ocean. Finally, he reached the embankment. The sea crashed violently against the rocks below. It was too steep. Would they tell him where to go? What to do?

  As if being sucked back into reality, he felt a familiar hand on his shoulder. All at once, the night felt a little too cool on his bare skin. The mist from the ocean made him shiver.

  “Mark. Let’s go back in the house.” His father’s voice was strong and steady like his hand on Mark’s shoulder.

  “Did you hear them, Dad?”

  “Come on, it’s time to go back in.”

  “But did you hear them, Dad?”

  “Yes, son. I heard them.”

  Chapter 11

  Jessica ran her paintbrush in long strokes across a canvas. Her movements mimicked the motion of the sea before her, sending ribbons of blues and greens dancing across a white backdrop. She narrowed her eyes and tried to focus on the ocean in front of her. But no matter how hard she tried to concentrate, the waves seemed to carry her mind back into Mark’s arms last night under the pavilion.

  But it wasn’t just the night at the pavilion that had her sidetracked. It had been the days leading up to the Summer Festival, too. And she wasn’t just distracted from her painting, either. She was preoccupied with thoughts of Mark when she was at work as well. While waiting on tables at Bonnie’s, Jessica would stare off into space. That is, until her customers cleared their throats to awaken her from her daydreams of Mark and would politely repeat their order. She found herself walking a little too slowly to deliver plates to a table, sometimes coming to a stop all together. Good thing that there was usually another waiter there giving her a nudge forward to kick start her feet again.

  Now, Jessica had new memories to get lost in. The bottom of her stomach seemed to fall out every time she thought of Mark staring at her from across the room. She could still feel his hands on her waist as they danced under the pavilion. His breath seemed to linger at her ear. And the trembling! Dear God! The very thought of Mark caused her whole body to quake, as if something were coming alive inside her. It was a shame that the night ended the way it did. If only Jeremy hadn’t come staggering along beating his chest…

  Jessica was sure that she saw desire in Mark’s eyes last night, but shreds of uncertainty lay all around her like pieces of driftwood on the shore. As much attraction as there was that passed between them, there seemed to be a hurdle it had to jump over. Jessica just couldn’t figure it out. She didn’t understand his behavior. One minute, Mark made her feel like she was the only woman in the room. The next moment, he pulled away from her and was gone as quickly as he came.

  His absence had left her on the edge of doing things that she never thought that she would do. Things that, if she witnessed other women doing them, she would have labeled them as desperate or needy. She thought about driving up to his father’s house to make sure he was all right. No, maybe he needed his space. Then, she had the idea of meeting him on the docks one night after he was through fishing. No, she would feel like she was intruding. Once she coursed through all of the crazy scenarios as she could, reason would make its grand entrance and remind her to take it slow. And when reason made its exit, she was left feeling lonely and foolish. So, she did what she could. She held onto their moments together; winding them and rewinding them like thread through her fingers, hoping that soon she would be able to add another layer.

  Even so, as Jessica stood on the beach biting at the end of her paintbrush she wondered where Mark was and what he was doing. It was silly to feel this way about someone so soon, right? She couldn’t help but think that maybe she was infatuated with him and that was all. She laughed as she envisioned herself as a crazy, redheaded, obsessed woman gnawing on the end of a paintbrush.

  Just as she was about to look back down at her canvas, something along the shore caught her eye. It was Mark jogging shirtless along the water’s edge. His skin glistened in the sun and she couldn’t help but notice the muscles in his chest and arms contracting with every movement. He seemed to be unaware of her presence as he ran past her and continued on behind a boulder near the shoreline. She flinched as she bit down on the paintbrush a little too hard. She kept her eyes on the rock, but he never came out on the other side.

  Jessica’s stomach flipped and excitement flooded her veins. Before reason had the chance to step in, she packed up her brushes and paints inside her tote. Holding her canvas under her arm she trudged across the sand as quickly as she could. When she was just inches from the boulder, it dawned on her that she had no clue what she was going to say or do. She took a deep breath and blew out any self-doubt that tried to settle in her chest. She needed to do this. She needed to know where she stood.

  She peered around the boulder. Mark was sitting against the rock with his forearms resting on his knees, appearing to be absentmindedly gazing at the sea. But as Jessica examined his face, she realized that his stare seemed attentive. She watched as he turned his ear to the ocean, as if he were trying hard to hear something. She shielded her eyes from the sun and looked out over the water. At first, she didn’t see
them. Then, there they were. One. Two. Five. There were so many that she stopped counting. There were dozens of seals bobbing their heads in and out of the waves. Jessica had never seen so many in one area before. She turned her focus back to Mark, who was still studying the rippling ocean. She cleared her throat.

  “Hello again.” She elevated her voice to be heard over the crashing waves.

  Mark startled. When he turned to look at Jessica, she immediately saw the aftermath of the night before. A slight cut hung above his brow that was paired with a purple ring around his eye. For a split second, she saw the flicker in his glance that she had seen under the pavilion the night before. Then, as if the flame had been extinguished, his eyes went dark and he looked back toward the water.

  “Hey, I didn’t see you there.” Mark’s voice was flat. He looked straight ahead at the ocean.

  “How are you feeling?” She touched her own brow.

  “Oh, you mean this?” Mark pointed at his eye without looking at her. “Doesn’t bother me at all.”

  “Looks pretty sore to me.”

  Mark waved his hand, as if to dismiss the idea that he was hurt.

  Jessica fell silent. She searched for the energy that seemed to envelop them the night before, but it was mysteriously absent. It was as if he couldn’t care less if she existed at all. Had she done something to upset him? She drew in a deep breath.

  “Look, Mark. I’m sorry about what happened last night. Jeremy can be a real asshole sometimes.”

  “I’m not sorry.”

  “You’re not?”

  “Nope. Truth is he did me a favor. And this little souvenir will serve as a reminder.” He pointed at his eye again.

  “Reminder of what?”

  Mark hesitated before answering, as if he was searching for the right words. He picked up a nearby stone and pitched it at the water. “A reminder of why I left this place to begin with and to get out of here as soon as possible.”

  “There are worse places to be, Mark.”

  “Such as?” He snickered.

  She shrugged.

  “Tell me, Jessica. What has this town ever done for you? Think about it. You had big dreams to have your own art gallery. Where did your dream go? Face it, this town sucked you in.”

  “It wasn’t meant to be, Mark. Some things are, some things aren’t. The way I see it, it’s fate that we’re here. Part of a bigger plan, you know?”

  “What do you know about life? You’re just a waitress. That’s all you’ll ever be.” Mark snorted.

  Jessica inhaled sharply and took a step back. His words slapped her across the face and her heart sunk. How did they go from the pavilion to this? But the sadness that settled in her core was quickly replaced by anger. How dare he project his own failures and hang ups on her! She took two steps forward and looked down at him.

  “You know what, Mark. Maybe you should go back to New York. There’s only room in this small town for one big head. And Jeremy has earned his keep.”

  She grabbed her canvas, turned around, and headed back up the beach. She didn’t look behind her to see how her words had affected him. It didn’t matter. She had gone behind that boulder to find out where she stood. And she had found what she was looking for.

  Chapter 12

  Like a child trying to hide a bad report card, Mark had successfully dodged his father all day Sunday. He didn’t want to discuss what happened between him and Jeremy. Furthermore, Mark didn’t know how to explain to his father why he was bare assed, in the middle of the night, looking out at the ocean. Hell, Mark didn’t know why either. In fact, there wasn’t much he remembered about that night at all.

  But Monday came all too soon and Mark found himself sitting quietly in his father’s truck on the way to the docks. And in the light of a new day, fragments of bad decisions appeared like shining slivers of broken glass all around him. Jeremy. His father. Jessica. One glaring shard at a time, he would have to clean up the debris of his own mistakes. As they pulled into the parking lot near the docks, his father broke the silence.

  “That’s a nice shiner you got there.”

  “Isn’t it though? Courtesy of your first mate.” Mark continued to stare straight ahead.

  His father chuckled and shook his head.

  “And over a woman, Dad. Can you believe that?”

  “I’ve never known Jeremy to fight over a woman.”

  “Well, he did. And when is a woman ever worth fighting over, huh?”

  “The right woman is always worth the fight. Besides, do you really think that it was over a woman? You’re smarter than that, aren’t you son?”

  His father held eye contact with him for a moment. Mark waited for his father to ask about the incident in the yard a few nights ago, but the question never came. As if he knew what Mark was thinking, his father quickly shifted the truck into park and got out.

  The boat seemed to rock tauntingly in the water as they neared the edge of the pier. Jeremy was on deck getting the boat ready for another day of fishing, when his eyes met Mark’s for a second. Mark straightened his posture and lifted his chin. This time he would be ready for anything Jeremy had to throw at him. Surprisingly, Jeremy diverted his glance and kept on with his busy work.

  “Good morning, Jim,” Jeremy didn’t look in Mark’s direction at all.

  “Morning,” his father said.

  After Mark had boarded, he realized that his father remained on the dock looking at the boat.

  “Listen up, fellas.” His father took a step closer to the vessel. “I have some work to do on land today. So, I’m looking to the two of you to man the boat.”

  “By ourselves?” The words had already left Mark’s mouth before he realized how childish they sounded.

  His father raised his eyebrows and nodded.

  “With all due respect, Jim, I don’t think this is good idea.” Jeremy’s voice held an edge of panic.

  “Sure it is.” Mark’s father flashed a sarcastic smile before turning to walk back up the pier.

  “Dad, wait!” Mark made one last attempt at talking his father out of yet another round of unique disciplining. His father simply waved goodbye over his shoulder without looking back.

  His father moved up the pier and through the morning fog. Soon, his father was out of sight. Jeremy and Mark stood silently on deck for a few moments, as if they both secretly hoped he would come back. But he didn’t. Mark shook his head in disbelief.

  “What are we waiting for? Let’s just go. The sooner we get it done, the sooner we can get off this boat.” Mark threw his hands in the air.

  Jeremy walked past him toward the wheelhouse. A minute later, they were speeding off across the bay.

  Mark helped Jeremy pull the last trap of the day from the water and unfortunately it was like all the others: empty. Mark watched as Jeremy examined the cage for any breaks before re-baiting the trap and throwing it back into the sea. Jeremy leaned on the side of the boat and clasped his hands together. He shook his head.

  “I just don’t understand it. In all the years that I’ve been working on this boat, I’ve never seen every one of the traps empty. Never.” These were the first words that Jeremy had said to Mark all day.

  “I’m sure it’s just a fluke.” Mark waved his hand, as if to clear the air of any concern.

  “Do you know how much this fluke just cost us, Mark? Or is that even a worry of yours?”

  “I’m just saying…”

  Then, as if he couldn’t hold it in any longer, Jeremy spilled his anger onto the deck of the boat. “Don’t say anything! Just don’t!” Jeremy’s voice seemed to bounce off the boat and carry over the water. “Who the hell do you think you are? You’ve been gone for eighteen years, Mark. Eighteen fucking years! Not once did you visit your dad. Not once did you even pretend like he existed. Like you were too good. But he still talked about you like you were the best thing ever. I had to listen to him sing your praises every day. Every fucking day!”

  “I hardly think my r
elationship with my father is any of your business,” Mark said.

  Jeremy continued as if he didn’t hear Mark speak. “Then all of a sudden, here you are! Let me tell you something, while you were gone living your fancy life with your fast women, I was his right hand man. The man that he could depend on. What gives you the right to be on this boat?”

  And there it was. His father was right. The fight wasn’t about a woman. For a moment, Mark stepped into Jeremy’s rubber boots and took in the world. Jeremy’s world. This was his livelihood. This was all he knew. The risk of losing it all to Mark was too great. Dancing with Jessica probably sent him over the edge. Mark sat down on the deck and rested his back against the wheelhouse.

  “Jeremy, I’m not here to replace you.” Mark looked up at him.

  “Then why are you here?”

  “I got in over my head, man. I had nowhere else to go.”

  “Let me ask you something, Mark. Have you even made an attempt to get back to your big city?”

  “No, I haven’t. Not yet.”

  “Why not?” Jeremy asked as if he were desperate to get him to leave.

  “Because I don’t know if I have what it takes anymore!”

  Then, there was silence. He hung his head between his knees. Mark realized that he had never uttered those truthful words aloud to anyone. When he looked up, Jeremy was sitting next to him.

  “Look, I’m sorry about the other night,” Jeremy said.

  “I thought you punched me over Jessica.” Mark laughed.

  “Nah, Jess is just a friend. Don’t get me wrong. She’s cute. And if I wanted her, I’d take her from you.”

  “Sure you would.”

  Mark and Jeremy laughed and sat side by side against the wheelhouse for a few minutes longer. Things were good for now. One shard at a time. One glaring shard at a time.

  Chapter 13

  Mark rolled down the passenger window of Jeremy’s truck and watched the docks disappear in the rearview mirror as they made their way back to town. Mark was exhausted. Today, the mental demands of being on the boat far outweighed the physical. He looked from the corner of his eye at Jeremy. He drove with one hand on the steering wheel, while his other hand tapped on the doorjamb to the beat of a song playing on the radio. Jeremy was different than any other man he knew that was his age. He was a simple man, but he was hardworking and honest. Mark never felt like he truly knew anyone in New York. Behind all the suits and ties, who were they? But as he looked over at Jeremy, he had a good sense of who he was. There was no mask. No façade. Suddenly, an emotion surfaced in Mark’s core that he had not felt in some time; loneliness. His stomach burned as he came to the sharp realization that he could not speak of any friends back in New York. Mark didn’t know if he could call Jeremy a friend yet, but he was definitely a guy that he hoped to be able to sit and drink a beer with someday.